Spoil Yourself Steak

I found out a new fascinating fact the other day.

A Venus Fly Trap could consume a human being.

For this to happen the aforementioned human would have to be served up to the predatory plant in little bits, of no more than one gramme at a time (each gramme taking about 1 3/4 days to process). Anymore than that and it would freak out and stop working.

On that basis, given the average human weighs about 75,000 grammes, it would take the little blighter 378 years to finish off dear Aunt Gladys. (BTW all this information is courtesy of a Sunday Times journalist, @MattRudd, who is paid money to come up with this stuff. Some people have the life. Still, he reckoned it was 1,500 yrs but I reckon its 378. It matters people).

So what, I hear you yawn. In fact someone might be reading this and thinking what is this drivel, where is the steak. Actually if someone is reading this then I’m really happy. If someone is reading this and still thinking, I’m ecstatic).

Well the point is, if a Venus Fly Trap can eat a man in 378 years (admitedly in very small portions), then how long would it take to eat this steak?


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Fillet Steak with Bacon-Stuffed Mushrooms

As I enter the 8th week of my ‘yes-I-can-lose-weight-and-blog-about-cooking’ diet I suddenly realised I have been neglecting meat. Vegetable soup and the like is all very nice but it doesn’t require a great deal of tearing or chewing.

Although I made this creation a while ago it looks so good to me now (as I chew on my muesli) that I couldn’t resist any longer and so I invite you to join me in an a veritable orgy of virtual mastication.

An object of desire (try and ignore the mushroom and the green thing)…

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