Tesco – taking ‘Every Little Helps’ to heart

So Tesco (the UK’s biggest retailer) just announced that it has been overstating its half-year profits by 25% (about £250m). It’s not clear how long this has been going on but the omens aren’t good.

Tesco is to the UK what Walmart is to the USA, minus the firearms. Thousands of stores, millions of customers. It takes nearly 30% of the UK market. It has so much food I get fat shopping there and have to go on diets all the time.

Now, Tesco’s ubiquitous marketing slogan is ‘Every little helps’. And it would appear that the company has been taking this message to heart.

Herbal tea – how much is too much…

So we were doing one of our regular online grocery shops the other day. When I say ‘we’ I mean ‘the wife’. My job is to stick my head in cupboards to look for things we already have to make sure we don’t end up with fifty tins of beans.

I’m not very good though. Hence when it came to herbal tea, I happened upon…

Magimix Mayo – Jingle Bells!

Oh joy. After several years of comments, reminders, suggestions and telekinetic mind control, I got the Christmas present I always wanted. Santa (sorry I mean the Mrs, for those of you cynics who no longer believe a big hairy man with large red balls tries to get down your chimney every year) delivered. A Magimix.

Horse Meat Joke Requiem

Okay this is the last post on this particular subject. However I justify it’s presence here on the basis that a) it made me laugh and b) it’s about food and, after all, this is a food blog.

Over here (i.e. anywhere between Ireland and Russia) we recently found out we’ve been eating horses when we thought we were eating cows. And it started in Tesco (the UK’s version of Walmart). And in Tesco you get poor-people’s food and not-so-poor-people’s food – either way we’ve all been eating horse shit)…

Out with the old, in with the new

Three years ago we got married. In the run up to that event I got myself a rowing machine. I mean I wasn’t going to spend my honeymoon in St. Lucia blubbering about like a beached whale. Sadly I didn’t stick with it. Once the ring was on it was all downhill. The night of the wedding we ended up eating pizza in a pub in Henley on Thames. You get the idea.

Fast forward to 2013. My ’emergency diet’ did a job in the fourth quarter of 2012 but things aren’t going well now. I mean last night I ate pork belly and breast-of-duck; and a bottle of wine. And then fell asleep. So today I made a decision – out with the old….

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