Goulash – Brain Food for PowerPoint Monkeys

For those who work in ‘Big Corporations’ you may well know that it’s ‘Strategy Season’.

You know when Elmer Fudd goes mad with a double-barrel shotgun during Rabbit-Hunting Season? Well it’s just the same in ‘Big Corporations’ during Strategy Season – little Fudds stride the corridors of power with PowerPoint slides in hand, hunting for strategies that will see them through to next year.

And what, you may well (and rightly) ask, has all this got to do with Goulash? Not a great deal, but given the amount of time I am currently spending on PowerPoint, recipes need to deliver results that satisfy my short-term strategic objective (that is: feed me, I’m hungry) whilst also satisfying the time-poor nature of the day-to-day.

My longer term aspiration (stop feeding me, I’m on a diet) will be satisfied in the second stage of the development cycle, which will begin when my waistline fails to align correctly with my suit trousers and I enter a corporate condition known commonly as ‘you fat bastard’.

Until this stage is reached there is Goulash.


Goulash originated in Hungary. I’ve done some market research, identified the primary competitors, shortlisted the key elements of the product and realised that, in reality, no one really knows what a goulash is (except it has paprika in it) and settled on a recipe from the BBC.


The ingredients are simple:

  • 3 beef cheeks
  • cooking chorizo
  • olive oil
  • garlic
  • 2 onions
  • red pepper
  • green chilli (optional)
  • salt and pepper
  • 2 tbsp tomato purée
  • 1 tbsp flour
  • tin tomatoes
  • 7fl oz beef stock
  • 3 tbsp paprika
  • bay leaves
  • parsley
  • chives
  • soured cream

First off get the cheeks ready – chop into inch size pieces. See those ribbons of sinew? After slow cooking they melt like butter…


Fry in a casserole in two batches until well browned:


Set the meat aside and then gently cook the onion, chilli and garlic until softened. Add the flour and paprika


Add the stock, wine, tomatoes and puree and stir well. Pop in the chorizo and bay leaves:


Put in the oven at 160 centigrade for 2 hours. Leave alone! Take out the oven and add the peppers. Put back in the oven for another half hour:


Finally stir in the chopped parsley:


Serve with decent bread, sour cream and chopped chives:


Finally, a shot of the beefy interior:


So there you have it – sustenance for Corporate Fudd!

16 thoughts on “Goulash – Brain Food for PowerPoint Monkeys

  1. And here I was thinking that you were off on vacation – I’m sorry. Was there a sale on paprika? Reason is I’m typing up a recipe for chicken paprika that I just made last night. I think you’re presentation’s probably better than mine, Powerpoint or not.

  2. Ah I really don’t miss strategy season… What am I saying, it’s all a lie!!! I loved strategy season. Powerpoints and Excel spreadsheets actually do make my heart skippity skip. I claim my prize. I AM Elmer Fudd. And I love goulash. 😀

  3. Yes please – that’s a proper dish! My organisation works for a number of large public sector bodies so, to use the same analogy, March/April was about stuffing our faces as the diet started again after April 5th 😉

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